Ch-ch-changes...

All go here. I've created a new blog to put up my shorter writing (short stories, writing about life, etc. - see link on the right) so I can keep this blog totally dedicated to the novel I'm not writing.

Also, chapter 1 is to change. There are two ways to do this, so bear with me while I tell you about it.
Why Change?
I quite like chapter 1, however, it's not doing what it's meant to do as a chapter. I think the bones of a good short story are there, but also the bones of a good chapter. But it can't really be both. As it was conceived as a chapter, what it needs to do is drive the story behind the novel. I'm old school like this. While the writing must be good, I think the story needs to shine. In this case, the story isn't shining (and the writing could do with a bit more of a polish).
There are two ways to make the story shine: language/idea and plot.

An example of language/idea: A guy can't get out of bed. His family and boss all stand outside the door telling him to get up. He doesn't. Fairly mundane, except the reason he can't get up is because he turned into a bug overnight. Nice one, Kafka. You're gripped by the opening line; it makes you want to know a) what's happening, and b) what 's going to happen next. Instant compulsion. Also, Beckett can write fantastically about very little indeed. Although it takes me three reads of anything to really "get it", because I'm so busy looking for things that aren't there. Anyway, hopefully you get the idea; so onwards.

Plot: Plot is a more obvious way to make the story shine, and in some ways harder option. More obvious because by adding more action, you keep people hooked. Harder because the action you add has to hook people in the first place. Also, the actions can't just be plucked from the cosmos. You have to ensure that characters' actions make sense , as well as feed the plot (although, personally, I want to write a book of chaos where this rule just doesn't apply). Of course, most Westerns are plot driven, so the clue may be in the question there. But at the same time, a ponder is called for.

Adding ideas/language would flesh out some ideas, maybe try to get a but of humour in there, and try to make the chapter more compulsive of itself. Maybe a bit more dialogue, possibly some limps, blindness or other physical attribute would be added. A dead horse could fall on the roof of the van - who knows? Adding to the plot would speed up the whole thing. Instead of arriving into the town at the end of the chapter, that would happen at the end of the first paragraph, and we could get a bit of a scan of the town as Tommy McDonagh gets into fights, talks, drinks, etc, pushing us right into Chapter 2.

While I ponder this, I'd appreciate any input you may have. Let me know which approach you'd prefer - do you want to get some action going, or would you prefer to take it easy, sit back on the porch and drink a beer. I'm taking a straw poll, so you can mail me a mail (see link on the right), or leave a comment. All contributions welcome.

Sketches from Chapter 2 #1

Shea pulled up beside the billboard, graffitied to read "The Beautiful Bog - Holes for the Effluent." It was a new estate, designed for the influx of middle managers with the building of the warehouses on the other side of town (graffitied "Whorehouses to Let - Competitive Rides"). He mumbled "Just going in to the Bog to scare out the kids." A static screech implied assent. He took the torch from the backseat, and walked through the rubbled entrance.
****

"What do you want?"
"A pint... and is there a B and B around here?"
"Hmmph. Course there is. I don't want any trouble, hear me?"
"You'll get none from me. Unless I can't get a B and B."
"Comedian, eh?"
"No, a philosopher of sorts. Tommy McDonagh's my name." He looked at the hand, glanced at the rising stout, and went on wiping the counter.

****

When he got back, he saw the locks busted on the shed door. He went round the side to look in a window or something. No joy, so he went back to the big double doors, and carefully pushed them in with his foot. There was a smell and a sound. He walked in, toward the sound, and as it turned out, away from the smell.